第三十二节 毁之易剥之难(2 / 2)

仙都 陈猿 1249 字 2022-09-29

秦贞道:“当年在仙都的时候,我是他的小师妹,他是我的魏师兄,虽然跟了他最久,却未必是最贴心的人。赤霞谷之乱的时候,他跟余瑶被困在山腹中,朝夕相处,有两三年光景,无话……不谈……”她的声音渐渐低了下去,目光澄澈,没有一丝杂质。

“你是怎么知道的?”

“有一次闲谈时,余瑶说起的,她虽然看上去刚硬,却没有什么心机,很纯粹的一个人。这是魏师兄私下里说的。”

“嗯,然后呢?”阮静的心怦怦直跳,似乎重重帷幕揭开,惊人的秘密即将呈现于眼前。

秦贞望着她心心挂念的小模样,笑了起来,“你不会想到,余瑶跟我说了什么,当然,那些话不是她说的,她只是转述,那些话……是魏师兄说的。”

“他说了什么?”

“一些心里话,他从来没跟我说起,只对余瑶说过。”秦贞犹豫了一下,余瑶没有瞒她,她也不会瞒着阮静,“他说,这世上没有人会无缘无故对别人好,所有的付出,无论有心或无意,都希望得到回报,这种回报,有时是眼前的所得,有时是长远的收益,有时是内心的满足,任谁都不能免俗。无事献殷勤,非奸即盗,与其相信口不应心、心藏鬼域的伪君子,不如明明白白地做交易。”

一字不漏,一字不差,余瑶在心中记挂了无数遍,秦贞也是如此。年轻时浑浑噩噩不懂事,这么多岁月过去了,再回想起来,总觉得有些不是滋味。

阮静下意识摇了摇头,“未必都是如此吧,总有一些不求回报的付出,夫妻之间……母子之间……”她有些迟疑,不那么确信。

“是啊,当时余瑶也是这么反驳的,他说,父母为子女付出,其实是希望自己的血脉延续下去,丈夫对妻子付出,是希望她为自己生儿育女,本能和天性背后也隐藏着目的,人与人之间,究其根本,其实不外乎‘利益’二字。”

阮静苦笑道:“原来他是这么想的,原来……只是一场交易而已……”

“我猜,他从来没有真正喜欢过一个人,你对他好,他也会对你好,但是对他来说,这只是一场‘交易’,他不会辜负,不会背弃,但是他从来没有投入过感情。他会为了我找来大象真人的身躯寄魂,他会为了你闯入尺蠖小界,把你带回身边,但是,他从来没有投入过感情。”

阮静触动心事,她记起在镇妖塔中他说的那个故事,陈塘关总兵李靖第三个儿子的故事,说他剖腹剜肠,割肉剔骨,杀父泄愤,说“你不负我,我不负你,你若负我,我弃之如敝屣,不念也不顾。”她忽然觉得疲倦,打心底发冷,她不明白,秦贞为什么要跟她点破这些——是心存怨尤,想找个人倾诉么?

秦贞将目光投向郁郁葱葱的山林,展颜一笑,道:“不过,即使是一场交易,又有什么关系呢?我喜欢他,我愿意投入感情,我不在意他身边有没有旁人,也不在意那人是不是大象真人,会不会成就真仙,能不能陪他一起飞升天庭,我不在意……我只知道,只要我不负他,他就不会负我。”

阮静沉默了许久,秦贞的脸,那张与记忆中迥然不同,大象真人李静昀的脸,让她觉得无比陌生。

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