第五十二章:转换(2 / 2)

我捡起了哭丧棒,挣扎的站起来,一棍子就抽向了凌童的脸。

啪!

"啊!"凌童剧痛得打滚起来。

"狗货!让你他娘的死命抽我!"我一边怒骂,一边拿着哭丧棒朝他身上所有地方招呼,打得他浑身冒烟,就跟仙人跳舞一个样。

"主人,别打了,再打他可就魂飞魄散了,那是哭丧棒,摄魂的,每一下都能打飞一缕鬼魂。又不是打狗棍哟,打多了会消失的。"宋婉仪有些担心的看着凌童跟我说道。

"什么?你怎么会……"我一听,这宋婉仪怎么能说话了?声音还这么甜美,一看周围的环境,才想起是在阴间。

"这里是阴间呀主人,还有……您的姿势是不是该……换一换?"宋婉仪也跟我说道,然后看了我全身上下穿着布条装,还一脚得意的耷拉在凌童身上,露出了不雅的东西来。

这随便动一下,男人的魅力挡都挡不住,她当然是脸色潮红,羞得都不好意思说了。

"他姥姥的。老子才抽了六十四棍,还没够两倍呢!"我故作凶狠的瞪了凌童一眼,躲过了尴尬,又踹了几脚:"把你那身皮扒了给我!快点!"

"夏……爷!六十四够两倍多了……求别……打了……我扒,扒就是!"凌童还要犹豫,看我又抡起棍子,立即就把官服给扒拉了下来,双手捧给了我。

"哇哇!哥哥光光了,惜君要抱抱!"惜君吃完了一群鬼差,看到我要穿新衣服了,也不管我才刚脱光光,跑过来就要做个好奇宝宝索抱,我立即用官服遮住重要部位。

那凌童看我丢给他一身原来我穿的狱服,他也懂的羞耻,马上就穿上了,他毕竟身为引渡官,身份还是很重要的,总不能赤身裸体吧。

官服应该是阴司特制的,打得那么狠,硬是没有留下一点裂痕,怪不得我看那凌童好像蛮抗打,差点没把他魂给打灭了。

不过这身狗皮官服穿起来倒相当的帅气,宋婉仪和惜君看到我都眼前一亮,这可比刚才的布条乞丐装好多了。

倒是凌童现在佝偻着身体。浑身青烟,还不敢站直了腰板,他这要真站直了,那就曝光了。

"你刚才不是站得笔挺嘛,这身份一倒置你就成这样了?"角色的转换让我心情好了些,摸了摸身上还冒着的一丝青烟。我真想抽死这凌童,下的手也忒狠了点,差点打得我魂都飞了。

"夏爷,您瞧您说哪话呀……我这也不是迫不得已么,您的事上头也是有明令的,而且前面枷锁将军还在那等着呢。我哪能假公济私不是……我真不是和您故意作对呀!"凌童真给我打怕了,好容易新官上任三把火,还接下了个上头勾重犯魂的差事,回去可就是重要的升官加分,这下表现不得反给人表现了,他是窝火兼憋屈。又不得不陪着笑脸。

"快说!老子怎么才能还阳?勾了魂,总得有还阳的办法吧!"我想着,之前电视不是报道不少人死了几个小时,还能活过来?这肯定是死后在阴间和狱卒老大商量好了,所以还阳是有办法,关键还是条件,况且我才死了多久?

"还阳是大事呀,除非勾错魂,经由上面城隍爷,二十四司会审,签了同意文书,您才能过还阳道……现在这种情况恐怕难了……要不您老就将就下,在阴司当差吧?您能差遣两名鬼大将,去了城隍那,也必是官职在身呀!"凌童小心的赔着说道。

我一听,立马就朝他踹了一脚:"滚你这狗货!老子好好的活人不当,还要当你们阴司的鬼差!?要是我还阳不了,我宁可拼了命也拆了你们这小小的县城隍庙!"

凌童一听,脸上一阵青一阵绿,吓得是浑身岔气:这位爷太任性,司职阴司不好么?能对一群鬼差呼来喝去,好吃的好喝的伺候,别人想当还当不了,都说人间正道是沧桑,现在这年头,人哪有当鬼强?

不给你还阳还不愿意了?还要拼命?

"夏爷!我只是小小的引渡官,反正您老城隍肯定要走一遭的,要不先跟我走一趟?"凌童没法子了,他只得眼珠子转了转,想请我这尊大神到城隍那好撂担子,他反正是不愿再伺候我了,没准到了城隍那,枷锁将军大展神威,和众英勇鬼差一拥而上,把我捆了,到时候还不是阴司说的算?自己也好给这位爷上一堂做鬼要低调的课不是?

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