【937】炮决企鹅(2 / 2)

两人手忙脚乱地把企鹅抬起来,并且摘掉了充电桩。

“机器企鹅的充电口怎么设计在菊花上……”

阿雪吐槽还没结束,却感到陆瑟用力把企鹅的头部拽过去,目标竟然是午夜烟花组中间的一尊大炮。

“诶?诶?”

“来不及了!这是烟花大炮,为了防止它发射激光,只能提前把它毁掉!”

单论力量,阿雪并不是陆瑟的对手,何况她一路上已经消耗了很多体力,还为了救落水的南宫老师弄得浑身湿透。

“进去吧您内!”

“嘎~嘎!”

陆瑟奋起双臂,在机器特朗普反击之前,把它头冲里塞进了烟花炮筒,大小粗细还真的差不多。

工作人员见到两只企鹅脚在炮口乱晃,大惊:

“不要乱塞东西进去啊!还没到午夜放烟花的时候,现在弄出来会出事故的!”

“阿雪,你把大炮对准天空,一定要防止特朗普爬出来!”

陆瑟不但不理会工作人员,还大跨步迈过地面上的杂乱线缆,来到了烟花控制台前面。

工作人员比陆瑟强壮,但因为陆瑟没穿衣服,变态气场令工作人员不敢违抗。

就像是《绝代双骄》里面的恶人“李大嘴”,就连一些武功更高的敌人知道他吃人以后,见面都怵他三分。

“啪啪啪啪啪!”

陆瑟双手十指弹动,以非常复杂的手法启动了烟花控制面板,如果不是他没穿衣服,跟音乐会现场调音的操作也不遑多让。

“你、你怎么会操作烟花控制台?难道、难道你是我的前同事张三?”

陆瑟没工夫去想工作人员为什么有一个法外狂徒张三前同事,他操作烟花控制面板的本事,是看迪士尼乐园烟花表演纪录片时,顺便记在脑子里的。

“嗤啦~轰!啪!咔嚓!咻!”

随着陆瑟的手指停下,现场烟花齐放,黑暗的天空瞬间被五颜六色的花束填满。

“哎哎哎,烟花表演怎么提前开始了?不是说午夜才会有吗?”

游人们纷纷向江面上抬起头来。

“好厉害!这样就不用熬夜了!”

“混蛋啊!本来要等到午夜和女友开房,现在烟花提前出来,岂不是我的如意算盘要落空了?”

“嘿嘿嘿老六正好去上厕所了,活该他看不着呵呵呵呵!”

“轰!!”

烟花大炮里藏着重头戏,巨量的火药冲上天宇,在非常显要的位置盛放出太阳一样的光辉。

“诶?你们看,这个太阳烟花中央,是不是有一只企鹅?”

“真的哎!企鹅还冲天上发射激光了!是特色烟花吗?太有趣了!”

“啊,爆炸了!是谁在炮决企鹅啊!”

“残骸掉进江里了!还好没伤到人!”

有许多美国人和美国以外的人,想要把总统特朗普发射到太阳上去,但是因成本过高而放弃。

陆瑟帮他们圆了一个梦想,虽然是假的机器特朗普,也是假的太阳,但谁又能确保特朗普是真的在当总统呢?

机器企鹅的零件和灰烬散落江中,陆瑟这时才长出一口气,感到身体的疲劳一阵阵袭来。

刚想去找件衣服穿,赵遥的话筒光速怼了上来。

“请问这位不喜欢穿衣服的少年,你做出这种事情,是不行想出名?是不是对体制不满?是不是像韩寒一样想上《时代》杂志封面?”

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