第一千二百七十八章 神赐与天赋(下)(2 / 2)

终末之龙 聂九 1048 字 2022-04-21

他说了那么多,却好像只有第二句话让白鸦有了点兴趣。

“你看到过他。”她紧盯着他,居然并无怀疑:“神长什么样儿?”

埃德嘴角抽搐:“……他长什么样跟他想做什么有关系吗?”

“可我想知道。”快要一百岁的女法师任性到无赖,“好奇是美德!”

埃德只能向她描述。

他原本以为诸神并无躯壳。可当他在星燿的回忆中看到那些模糊的光影,他意识到他在安克兰所见的地狱里,那陷在荒芜大地上巨大而怪异的、半腐烂的形体,恍惚便是其中的一个。

许多混乱而隐秘的线索,微小而零碎的细节,在一个又一个不眠之夜和满怀焦虑与惶恐的每一刻在他脑子里纠缠盘旋。他努力拼凑出可能的真实,又从许多的可能之中寻找出必然。他的确总担心自己做出了错误的判断,可他从未停止思考,等着有谁把结果送到他嘴边。

他描述着那个世界的烟与火,风与沙,描述那燃烧在天空和火焰,描述它无尽变幻的怪异与美丽,描述世界尽头似有似无的高墙,描述那支撑大地,不死不活的躯体,也诚实地描述那双黑色的眼睛里意料之外的温暖……他所见的未必就是真实,可当他无法确定,他至少要真实地描述他的所见。

白鸦的眼中光芒闪烁,她对地狱的向往从来不假。

“真希望我也能去看一看。”她喟叹。

“可你不会希望我们的世界也变成那样。”埃德说,“许多人……大多数人,没有办法在那样的世界里生存。”

白鸦垂下双眼,沉默着。

埃德无法驱散心中的不安——他对白鸦会做出怎样的决定并无把握。她的爱是真的,可她的恨也是真的,甚至或许比爱更为强烈。她的固执和疯狂是她素未谋面的后代能软化消除的吗?她真的在意那些所谓的“同伴”吗?她曾隐藏在偏僻之地,做着将一切都控制在自己手中的“夫人”,如果有机会……

“我曾希望得到很多。”白鸦开口,“我曾有很多很多小小的希望……而后我的希望只剩了一个,毫无可能实现的一个,再然后,我就什么都不想要了。我活着,只是因为我不甘心就此死去,但只是‘活着’,又那么无趣——你怀疑我对保护这个世界毫无兴趣,你猜得一点也没错,可我对毁灭它或控制它也同样没有半点兴趣。”

她对埃德歪着头笑:“你对我说实话,所以我也对你说实话。萨克西斯让我来找你,让我来寻求‘合作’,因为这是他最后的机会。他已经在这个世界停留得太久,即使圆月升起,他也不过苟延残喘。可他真心爱着他所保护的私语者……至少有一半是真心。他们像他一样无处可去,无所归属,而他无论如何也不能扔下他们。我想你可以相信他,埃德,就像你,他有个老母鸡一样优柔寡断又护崽的灵魂。”

“……可是,”埃德轻声说,“那并不是他唯一的灵魂。”

“的确,”白鸦嗤笑,“你得小心这个……可你也得感谢这个。几千年的时间里他只会小心翼翼地把他的小鸡崽儿们护在自己身边,画个圈圈圈起来,如果属于龙的那一半灵魂没能挣脱而出,直到世界毁灭他也只会缩在白石岛上,而不是像现在这样孤注一掷。当然,如果你指望从我这里知道他是不是真的只有一片仁慈之心,那我可没法儿回答,我只能告诉你我听到的,看到的,猜到的——像你一样。”

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